INTEGRITY

This week I pray for integrity.

This week I made choices that were so totally freeing to my soul and yet  contradictory to my family’s tradition and culture.

This weekend was Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the Jewish year.  According to Chabad.org, it is the "day on which we are closest to G-d and to the quintessence of our own souls.  It is the Day of Atonement.  For nearly twenty six hours, practicing Jews abstain from food and drink, washing their bodies and sex.   They pray indoors, in a synagogue, in a type of religious fervor until the end of the Fast when they share food together.

This tradition no longer felt right for me.   On so many different levels, I was seeking a more spiritual experience of connecting with my divinity.    Friday night, after sitting with my parents for their Friday night meal (cooked by LoverBoy – woohoo), I took myself to Raja Yoga at Anuttara Yoga Shala.

This Friday, our class was smaller and more intimate.  I had the opportunity to practice right next to my yoga teacher, Philip, and right in front of a mirror.  The music embraced me while the heat in the room allowed me to release the tension in my muscles and access a deeper layer of myself.

 

This form of practice tranquilizes the mind while energizing the body and soothing the soul.  For me, it is an opportunity to open my body and heart and empty my mind.  My teacher, Philip has a peaceful engaging voice which keeps me present and focused in my body – melting into my bones while my connective tissue expands and my hips open.

As I listened to his gentle voice guide my body, his truthful words were punctuated by powerful thunder that matched the electromagnetic energy we were creating in the room.  A bolt of lightning illuminated the top windows in the Tapas Hall and lit up the statues of Shiva Shakti and made my experience even more mystical. 

Philip reminded us of the sacredness of our practice as it was also the 9^th day of the Navaratri holiday – a Hindu holiday that honors Shakti (the Divine Feminine/Mother) and looks to her for spiritual cleansing, guidance, and enlightenment.    With sweat pouring out of my cells, my body felt limber and my mind was at peace.  I knew I was in the right place, at the right time.

I prayed during my practice for my forgiveness and asked for more compassion and patience with myself.  I prayed for more listening to the guidance from within.  I prayed to the inner child that I honor her and laugh with her and put her first.

Even though this is not how many Jews practice this High HolyDay, this is how this recovering Jew became in integrity with her spirit.    

For me, integrity is finding my way into the world truthfully – not because my parents said so, or religion dictates or this is how everybody does it but rather because it resonates within.  It creates an inner experience that radiates my light into the world.

And so, I laugh at loud and follow my own path, knowing that this is my way of bringing peace into this world and chahahanging history to herstory.

Nico & Vinz sing it like it is.  Enjoy!!!